So I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that none of you have ever seen this book before. Well, when I was a kid, the library had a copy of this book, and I borrowed and renewed it constantly for almost a year. When I finally really returned it, I could never find it again. It was my favorite collection of scary stories, and essentially sparked my interest in the horror genre, but I was sad knowing I’d probably never see a copy again. Then, yesterday, I found a copy on sale for $2.29, and I had to get it, despite the fact that it’s essentially meant for ten year olds. I’m so excited to have found it after ten years, and that I now own it. 😍📚❤️ #book #bibliophile #scarystories #happy
I’m really just. I’m not okay right now.
Famous Last Words:
- Pardon me, sir. I did not do it on purpose. - Queen Marie Antoinette after she accidentally stepped on the foot of her executioner as she went to the guillotine.
- I can’t sleep. - J. M. Barrie, author of Peter Pan
- I should never have switched from Scotch to Martinis. - Humphrey Bogart
- I am about to — or I am going to — die: either expression is correct. - Dominique Bouhours, famous French grammarian
- I live! - Roman Emperor, as he was being murdered by his own soldiers.
- Dammit…Don’t you dare ask God to help me. - Joan Crawford to her housekeeper who began to pray aloud.
- I am perplexed. Satan Get Out. - Aleister Crowley – famous occultist.
- Now why did I do that? - General William Erskine, after he jumped from a window in Lisbon, Portugal in 1813.
- Hey, fellas! How about this for a headline for tomorrow’s paper? ‘French Fries’! - James French, a convicted murderer, was sentenced to the electric chair. He shouted these words to members of the press who were to witness his execution
- Bugger Bognor. - King George V whose physician had suggested that he relax at his seaside palace in Bognor Regis.
- It’s stopped. - Joseph Henry Green, upon checking his own pulse
- LSD, 100 micrograms I.M. - Aldous Huxley (Author) to his wife. She obliged and he was injected twice before his death.
- You have won, O Galilean. - Emperor Julian, having attempted to reverse the official endorsement of Christianity by the Roman Empire.
- No, you certainly can’t. - John F. Kennedy in reply to Nellie Connally, wife of Governor John Connelly, commenting “You certainly can’t say that the people of Dallas haven’t given you a nice welcome, Mr. President.
- I feel ill. Call the doctors. - Mao Zedong (Chairman of China)
- Tomorrow, I shall no longer be here. - Nostradamus
- Hurry up, you Hoosier bastard, I could kill ten men while you’re fooling around! - Carl Panzram, serial killer, shortly before he was executed by hanging.
- Put out the bloody cigarette!! - Saki, to a fellow officer while in a trench during World War One, for fear the smoke would give away their positions. He was then shot by a German sniper who had heard the remark.
- Please don’t let me fall. - Mary Surratt, before being hanged for her part in the conspiracy to assassinate President Lincoln. She was the first woman executed by the United States federal government.
- Now, now, my good man, this is no time for making enemies. - Voltaire when asked by a priest to renounce Satan.
No, but you forgot the best one
Either this wallpaper goes, or I do- Oscar Wilde, dying in an unfortunately papered hotel room
Oh my, Voltaire. I laughed at that one, too.
Nostradamus oh my god
At the tender age of fifteen, an event occurred which I still consider to be way up there in my most humiliating please-kill-me-now moments (and there are quite a few to choose from). My then-boyfriend Matt had earlier announced to a friend in an English class that we had had sex. This became a rumor which was overheard by teacher who apparently became concerned about my reputation. Cue the school nurse pulling me out of a science class, leaving everyone speculating that I must be pregnant, resulting in me sitting opposite the nurse and deputy head while they looked at me with utter disdain and asked me:
“So.. what exactly did you get up to with Matt?”
Expecting no more than a lecture, a few leaflets on sexually transmitted diseases and maybe a free condom if I was lucky, I made the very poor decision to just be honest. Unfortunately, I got quite a lot more than I bargained for. The school later called up my mum and told her the details of the conversation, which I thought had been in confidence. But even worse, they had also reported it to social services because they thought I was promiscuous and at risk.
At my school, apparently it was OK for teachers to listen to students’ gossip and label me as ‘promiscuous’ based on nothing more than rumor. Apparently it was OK to go behind my back to speak to my mum and social services, without even asking me how I felt about the whole issue. Apparently it was OK to make me feel ashamed and humiliated about having sex.
When the teacher first overheard Matt talking about us having sex – did they assume he was promiscuous? Of course not. Were social services informed just because he had decided to have sex? Not a chance. Had they even considered that he could be vulnerable? No way. The teacher speaking to him just told him to make sure he ‘put something on the end of it’. We had both done exactly the same thing and yet for me the consequences were much more severe. I either had to be vulnerable or promiscuous if I was having sex as a teen, whereas for Matt it was completely normal. The message was very clear – if you’re a girl having sex as a teenager, you’re a slut. If you’re a boy having sex – well, you’re just a boy.